"You are the bald embodiment of a mid-life crisis, an irresponsible father, a selfish lover, and a directionless hack with no real plan for your future. Also, you drive your mother's car."
Like I needed to pay Psychic Gina ten bucks to tell me that. Still, I gotta hand it to her. The lady knows her way around a crystal ball better than I know my way around an expired Appleby's gift certificate.
This mantra would be a lot more believable had it not been posted fifty yards away from this:
The World's Largest Six-Pack, outside the City Brewery in La Crosse. According to the sign, a person would need to drink a six-pack a day for 3,351 years to drink all this beer. You'd best get cracking, Stuart Keith.
There was something about this Beer King pose that reminded me of someone. And then I remembered that someone is a WSHSHP veteran.
High-stepping it in Sparta, Wisconsin.
I know what you're thinking; I have already sent them a link to my portfolio.
Wisconsin loves them some huge fiberglass statues. This is the famous Orange Moose outside Black River Falls.
See caption above.
Expounding on the giant rodent with giant blocks of cheese motif.
"SLINK, meet PER1NE. PER1NE? SLINK."